Back To The Old Grind

Back To The Old Grind

So it's back to that time of the year again, the academic year... yay. Much better than holiday time. Hmmmm

It's my second year of university at Nottingham; city of, not trent. I'm not a phegget. And because it is my second year I have elected to move out of student halls and upgrade into a house that I share with 5 other studious boys and girl.

The first thing that had to be sorted in the house before we moved in was, of course, room allocation. All the rooms in the house are plenty good but we all have our preferences and opinions, and it just so happened that there was one room nobody really wanted. So the only fair way to deal with this room was to pull it out of a hat bowl.

Even the girl looked like this

I'm telling you this shit was tense, which unlucky soul was going to spend the next year wishing the name papers had been mixed up ever so slightly differently in that mystical bowl. A hand dived in... Everybody held their breath as the small piece of paper was chosen. Hearts pounded. Hairs greyed. Noses sweated. Pants soiled. The name was read out...
IT WASN'T ME!! Oh boy did I feel relieved. FUCKING WAY MATEEEEE

This was just one of the many beautiful dreams I had following that fateful day.

Because the name that was read out... WAS me...

This is what I felt like (skip to 0:24)
 
Of course it was me, it was as if some power above made sure I would have some material to blog about. Cheers God, Allah, buddha, Vishnu, Guru nanak, Michael Jackson.
However after my initial slight disappointment I remembered that all the rooms were actually fine and I'd be happy with any of the rooms as long as all my stuff would fit.

So here I am in my new room, writing this post and all of my items fit, just about. However there are 1 or 2 or 13 things wrong with the room. Little niggles.

#1 It is the smallest in the house
#2 There is a shelf blocking half the sink so I have to lean just a teeny tiny bit across to use it. (Most annoying thing I have ever experienced. THE WORST THING)
#3 There is a chest of drawers blocking the wadrobe door
#4 A spider family lives in my wadrobe
#5 There is no space to rearrange the room into a better situation. (The current format is believe it or not the optimum use of the space)
#6 Broken skylight shade
#7 Dirty fuck skylight
#8 The ethernet port is under my bed. Obviously
#9 The wireless signal is poor, only in my room though :D
#10 The floor boards pinch my foot skin
#11 Damp marks, one of which looks like a minge  
#12 Water pings off of my skylight like the sound of banging frying pans
#13 The floor gives me splinters

But hey, at least the water is hot and the mattress isn't mouldy (after I got the mouldy one replaced). S'all good. Besides everyone agrees that the room next to mine is the worst anyway now.

Nights Out In Banging Notts (big time big time gurl)(banTARSAURUS REX HAHA)

Nottingham is a actually a pretty live place and after talking to my very, very many other students friends, have realised it's one of the better places in the country for students. There are always 2 places running student events each week day night and plenty of bars to buy horrible shooters in. (With names like "jellyfish").

But this year because I'm more mature and no longer a fresher, and keen about everything. I'm going to look for new places to go to for my super cool nights out; places that don't play sean-a-paul, pitbull, wrong direction, ask whether you have a 50 dollar bill or tell you that the roof is on fire. Basically I'm going to become a hipster arsehole and move away from the mainstream clubs with their mainstream music and mainstream drinks to find better places.

(As of yet I have been to the same Oceana 3 weeks in a row). Sick guy...

During this time I realised something, something powerful,something liberating, something poetic.
Going out to normal clubs, is CRAP.

Think about it, in order to enjoy these places you have to get drunk. One has to take drugs so that these hell shacks everybody loves going to is even remotely enjoyable. I'm sure everybody has been in a club when the white lights come on shortly or the strobes get going and it all becomes very clear how disgusting every single creature human actually is in the club. And don't get me started on the price of drinks (making a 400% mark up on one bottle of spirit). 

when the lights come on

The only thing that I truely enjoy and would enjoy even if I were sober is watching somebody far too drunk still trying to dance even though they can barely stand. I had a beautiful experience I had, watching a total fucking disgrace dancing (swaying her body like a zombie) while leant with her back against a wall and still falling over, backwards. Each time getting propped up by her very helpful friends and repeating the cycle 4 or 5 times before she is draped over a railing by a bouncer. Lovely lady.

(I wrote up to here less than a month into the new uni year, since then I have been literally bummed raped by work and have only now managed to find time again)

Which leads me nicely onto the academic side of university life.

I started this year much like everybody else does, "this is a new year, I'm gonna do sooooo much work. Gonna do all the example sheets go to every lecture"

*BEEP BEEP* (actually my alarm is the "good morning" ringtone from the samsung top of the range alarm tones)

Eurgh 9am lecture FUCK DAT

Me in the morning

However 10am lectures are an absolute joy, within that 1 extra hour all the rest of a whole week of sleep can be felt. Delightful.

But at least I get my example sheets done... when i'm not playing fifa... which isn't often... so i'm not getting my example sheets done...

The most annoying thing about this year though has by far been group work. On my course we often have to do group work, group work with people that are assigned to you and again because of the great God, Allah, buddha, Vishnu, Guru nanak, Michael Jackson in the sky I was assigned 2 dingbats and a stubborn but pleasant Scottish girl. 
One of the dingbats is just plain lazy wereas the other is lazy and maybe stupid I can't tell. He is a international student from the Malaysia campus that nottingham and he has just been an Oriental ball and chain for every piece of work that we do. During a whole 6 week project all he managed to complete despite my best efforts, was 1... single lousy handsketch. A 40 page project and all he did was a handsketch, what a wanker. 

I understand that maybe he didn't understand the work because of the language barrier so I tried to make sure that he did understand. I would ask him if he understood what he had to do, to which he would respond
 
"yes"
But you could tell he was clueless so I'd explain again,
"are you sure now?"
"yes"

But he would still have that confused look, grab the paper we were discussing, gaze at it and put it down looking more confused. And there's nothing I can do except for just saying.

"look, it is clear you don't understand, don't lie to me. I know. I can see your dumb face. Shall I explain it again for the 10th time?"